as read October 11, 2013
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If you want to be found, stand where the seeker seeks.–Sidney Lanier. “When does a good program turn into a bad program? When it becomes a hiding place. As adult children, we are good – no, ingenious – at finding hiding places.
Sometimes we hide behind our work by staying super busy. We hide in prayer itself – behind sweet-sounding words. We can choose to always be tired so we can hide in sleep. We can hide behind any of the “helper” roles by fixing others so we never have to fix ourselves. We can even make our program a hiding place by going through the motions, saying all the right things, but never really encountering ourselves. If we want to be found, we have to come out where somebody can find us. Your work is to commit to the following: I will identify my hiding places and make conscious decisions about choosing them or not.”
Days of Healing, Days of Joy by Earnie Larsen and Carol Larsen Hegarty
Where am I hiding? Am I hiding in this illness? If that’s true, then I don’t even want to know what scares me enough to keep me here, sick and tired and hopeless. And that admission, in and of itself – is enough to keep me here longer. Sigh…
Change Me
–Ruth C.’s Prayer
Change me, God,
Please change me.
Though I cringe,
Kick,
Resist and resent.
Pay no attention to me whatsoever.
When I run to hide
Drag me out of my safe little shelter.
Change me totally.
Whatever it takes.
However long You must work at the job.
Change me – and save me
From spiritual self-destruction.
